The One where Kids go Bonkers.

Another argument which reoccurs in the anti-divorce gibberish is that divorce leads to an increase in children’s psychological problems, depression, and what not.  It is true to a certain extent, since the rates of divorce and psychological problems did rise in parallel, but the interpretation is once again twisted to their likings.

The betrayal, deceit and abandonment children feel while their parents are going through a rough divorce are life changing. The fact that their parents are no longer an item and that their love died can screw up any kid’s future relationships or trust issues.  But wait a minute, would this not be the same on the child if their parents separate or just get an annulment?  In any case the love would still end, so why does divorce get such a bad reputation while the others don’t?

They make it seem as if the child’s heart is going to be scarred forever, and inked with sorrow just as the parents put ink on paper to scribble their names on divorce documents. It’s not like their children’s hearts are going to be torn apart with the signing of the divorce papers- it’s what the divorce papers symbolise.

Divorce symbolises the end of a traditional family and family life, not even the end of a family. And the end of the family as it was, is precisely what leads to divorce in the first place, and not vice versa.  Which therefore, makes empty-shell-marriages utterly empty.  What would be the point of living in a non-family-like-loving environment but just living in the same house? It would be like having room mates, while pretending that everything is alright.  And that has the potential to damage children more than divorce would.

A child doesn’t know the difference between divorce, separation or annulment.  What a child does know, and what would haunt them at the end of the day, is that his/her parents are no longer together, and no longer love each other like the once did. And that fact is going to be at the back of their heads, whether the parents get a legal divorce or not.

So if a child’s well-being is the concern for divorce to be approved or not, I suggest that people put their focus into sustaining their marriage while it still exists to prevent harming their kids, cause once it’s over, it’s over, divorce or no divorce.


5 responses to “The One where Kids go Bonkers.

  1. Hello, just found your website from stumbleupon. It’s not an article I would regularly read, but I loved your thoughts on it. Thank you for creating an article worth reading!

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